Blog #4
This past weekend I was able to witness something so sweet between my 2 tween daughters. My daughters are 51 weeks to the day apart and we are entering this challenging pre-teen/teen space with the normal hormonal reactions all parents face in this season of parenting. While my girls are close they have their little hiccups along the way where connection is lost or broken and we are navigating these challenges with the ultimate goal of instilling a life long sibling bond that will transition into adulthood. When they are at each other and nit picking at every little thing the other does I wonder if we will ever get there but this weekend while my middle daughter experienced a game ending strikeout in a tournament championship that left her sad, disappointed, and feeling as though she let her team mates down I saw something that took my breath away. In the grand scheme of life this one game may seem inconsequential to most; but in her little 11-year-old world and in that moment, it was a huge deal. She received words of encouragement from her team mates, coaches, and other parents but it was the sweet moment between her and her sister once the dust settled that left me experiencing such hope and gratitude for these two sweet girls God gave me.
As my middle packed up her gear in the dugout that had already been cleared out by her team mates and coaches my oldest daughter quietly slipped into the dugout and embraced her sister who then began to weep in her big sister’s arms. As the other team continued to celebrate with their championship trophy and fellow team mates, coaches, and family clearing the softball complex they both just stayed in the dugout in that embrace for several moments. Eventually my oldest whispered something to her little sister that brought a smile to her face and turned into sweet laughter. They then walked out of the complex together my oldest having her arm around her little sister’s shoulders the entire way.
This sweet exchange reminded me something so beautiful about how we can love, support, and encourage those around us. As a mom I wanted to run over and go into a long explanation about it wasn’t her fault, there were two other outs before hers, there were some errors on the field, the other team hit the ball well and on and on trying to convince her she didn’t let anyone down, she has so many strengths and gifts and she can learn so much from the experiences where we don’t achieve results we want. But what I saw was her sweet sister offer a hug filled with unconditional love, support, and empathy. She couldn’t change the outcome of the game or that her sister made the last out. I have no idea what she said to her sister that help bring a smile to her face and I don’t have to know because it was their moment, a moment filled with connection, a moment that will forever be cemented to an experience that started with pain but ended in being cared for.
What a sweet gift we can give others to see them exactly where they are, provide an empathetic response, and communicate through our words and actions. I want to challenge everyone this week to be aware of those around you, look up from your phones, look around when you are sitting at your kids’ games, be aware of those in the check-out line behind you, see your kids, spouse or friends that may be hurting and ask yourself “how can I offer support?” What an amazing thing we can do for each other when we actually slow down and connect through our experiences!
Rebecca